What do you do when your older child doesn't feel "loved" anymore once they have a baby brother/sister? How do you divide the attention between the two or how do you explain to the oldest why mommy has to pay more attention to the new baby? I'm going through this now with my 7 year old, every few weeks or months she comes to me or a member of the family and tells them she does not feel loved and she feels I pay more attention to her brother than her. I tried explaining to her that he is growing and iam teaching him things that I have already taught her and that's why I spend a lot of time with him and I tell her that I need her to help me teach him alson, she acts like she understands but then a week or so will go by and I'm having the same convo with her??? I do things with here whereas its just her and myself but it don't seem to be enough I don't know what to do at this point!!
I am the oldest of 10 children, and I can say that I understand where your oldest is coming from. It was not until I became an adult that I spent more time with my mom. My parents thought that by giving me everything that I wanted it would substitute for their lack of attention to me and my other siblings. This just turned into me being an spoiled child, and turning into a spoiled adult.
ReplyDeleteSo my advice from the oldest of many, get her a journal, let her express herself. Get her into activities that focus on her like dance class, or girl scouts, music lessons. Things that focus on her and only her outside of the house. This way when she is not getting enough attention at home, she always has somewhere else to receive it from.
I put her in girl scouts she was in creative movement and visual arts last school year and i did give her a journal and she wrote can i wear my sunglasses lol my pastor said if that is what is gonna make her happy let her wear them whether its raining, snowing or dark lol
ReplyDeleteI read your blog last night. I loved it. I wish I had some advice to offer you but I'm not a parent. But it seems to me the steps you are taking are the correct ones. Just make sure you hug and kiss her everyday and let her know you love her.
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