That's just my babies daddy (lol)

So my daughters father has little involvement in her life and my Fiancé is raising her as his own but you know children don't understand that so every time she  see's her father it's like super dad smh.. She will one day see him for what he really is an irresponsible, man-child who needs to grow up and help take care of his responsibilities!! Did I just vent back there oops I'm sorry lol... Now that the Fiancé and I are getting married she seemed to be acting out more, we sat down and spoke to our pastor and she said that she wished it was just her, myself and her father again.. The pastor asked if she knew that her dad and I didn't get along and she answered yes, but does she really understand or is she just saying that cause thats what she thinks we want to hear? I don't know and every time she gets in trouble she plays the "I don't feel loved" card which is getting old I feel defeated I have no more fight left in me and her father is no help when he says things like "we are over here playing house" and "he doesn't want to hear about no we" when the reality is there is a we that is raising the child he helped make.. Why are some fathers such losers? Can't we just ship them off to some planet? And he never speaks to me directly unless he absolutely has to he relays messages through her and it makes her feel like she is an adult he is apart of the problem not apart of the solution! I don't know what to do anymore... Help me readers to understand...